幽默放送

来源：时间：2008-01-17 10:08:46

　　没把头发全剪掉
　　
　　麦尔斯有时在上班时间去理发馆理发，但这是违反办公室规定的：职员只能利用自己的时间理发。，正当麦尔斯理发时，经理碰巧也进来理发，而且就坐在他旁边。
　　“你好，麦尔斯，”经理说。“我看到你在上班时间理发了。”
　　“是的，先生。正是这样。”麦尔斯平静地承认了。“可先生，你看，头发是在上班时间长的。”
　　“不全都是吧，”经理立刻说，“有一些是在你自己的时间里长的。”
　　“对呀，先生，你说得很对。”麦尔斯礼貌地回答说，“但我并没有把头发全都剪掉啊。”
　　I'm not Having it All Cut off
　　Miles sometime went to the barber's during working hours to have his hair cut. But this was against the office rules: clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time. While Miles was at the barber's one day, the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut and sat just beside him.
　　“Hello, Miles,” the manager said. “I see that you are having your hair cut in office time.”
　　“Yes, sir, I am,” admitted Miles calmly. "You see, sir, it grows in office time.”
　　“Not all of it," said the manager at once. "Some of it grows in your own time.”
　　“Yes, sir, that's quite true.? Answered Miles politely, "but I'm not having it all cut off.”
　　
　　父亲在哪儿？
　　
　　兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。
　　“看，”哥哥说，“这些画多漂亮呀！”
　　“是啊，”弟弟说道，“可是在所有这些画中，只有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢？”
　　哥哥想了会儿，然后解释道：“很明显，他当时正在画这些画呗。”
　　Where is the Father?
　　Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
　　“Look,” said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
　　“Yes,” said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?”
　　The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, “Obviously he was painting the pictures.”
　　
　　看情况
　　
　　旅行者：“我还能赶上3点钟那班到多伦多的火车吗？”
　　售票员：“那得看你跑得有多快。火车15分钟前开出。”
　　It Depends
　　Traveler: “Can I catch the three o'clock train to Toronto?”
　　Ticket agent:“That depends? on how fast you can run. It left fifteen minutes ago.”
　　
　　他就要死了吗？
　　
　　一个男人坐在酒吧里痛哭流泪。一个朋友走进来问他为何如此伤心。那人哭着说：“刚才医生告诉我，在我的余生里都要吃这些药片。”
　　他的朋友很轻松地指出，许多人一辈子每天都要吃药。“当然，”男人回答说：“但是他只给了我10片。”
　　 Is He Dying?
　　 A man was sitting in a bar with tears streaming down his face. A friend walked in and asked why he was so unhappy. The weeping one said, “The doctor has just told me I'll have to take these tablets for the rest of my life.”
　　 Cheerfully, his friend pointed out that many people have to take tablets every day of their life. “Sure,”came the reply, “but he only gave me ten.”
　　
　　那是我的裤子
　　
　　一个妇女在减肥一段时间后自我感觉特别好——特别是当她又能穿上很早以前就穿不上的牛仔裤时。她跑下楼冲她丈夫喊道：“快看，快看。我又能穿上以前的裤子了。”她丈夫看了她好一会儿，然后说：“亲爱的，我爱你。但那是我的裤子。”
　　These are My Jeans
　　After going on a diet,a woman felt really good about herself----especially when she was able to fit into a pair of jeans she had outgrown long ago.
　　“Look,look.”she shouted while running downstairs to show her husband.“I can wear my old jeans again.”
　　 Her husband looked at her for a long time,when said,“Honey,I love you,but these are my jeans.”
　　